Potty Training Is the Devil.

As a mom of three kids, you'd think I'd be a pro at this potty training stuff.

For the first kid, I had him shoot Fruit Loops like a game.. he thought it was the coolest. Then his sister was born, and he went back to being in pull ups because the accidents started happening again. Eventually, he was trained and life was well.

For the second kid, she saw Elmo or something say they had to go to the potty, and she asked for the potty. We got all of the potty training stuff, and she sat on it religiously. It seemed to take forever, but she got it, too. 

The third kid. Holy moly, the third kid.

So we were walking through the store, and he saw the potty. We had talked about when he "was a big boy he got to go on the potty", but that day he exclaimed, "I want to be a big boy and go on the potty!" 

"You do?!"

"Yeah!"

So we bought the potty. And the potty insert that he had to have. And stickers for the chart, and surprises for the treasure box.

We got home, set up the potty, the chart, the treasure box..... and nothing. I asked him if he wanted to try. Nope.

Okay.

So, the potty sat. I asked and prompted, and even tried to bribe him, but still, the potty sat untouched for months. When I convinced him to sit on it and try, he'd sit on it for HOURS if I let him, and then would scream for a diaper. He would get the diaper on and immediately pee or poop.

I went away last month to help a friend recover from surgery. I heard stories from my babysitter about how she can't stand the smell of his poop. I came home and had to clean the first poopy diaper in weeks. Dear God. It was awful.

I declared that he was going to be a big boy. Today. That was it. No more diapers.. Mommy couldn't do it anymore.

You would have thought I told him I was cutting off his arm, just because.

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

Yes, you know when you have to go potty, and you don't like sitting in diapers, it's time. End of discussion. Do not go pee pee or poopy on my floor because you'll have to clean it up with mommy. Okaaaaaaaaaaaay *sniff*

I put underwear on him, and did not falter. He went on the potty ALL DAY LONG!!! He had a minor accident that night.. but since then, he's been fully potty trained. He even wakes up in the morning with a dry pull up!!! WOOOOOHOOO! The only down side {three weeks into this} is that every single public place we go to, magically, he has to use the potty. Now if I could get him to NOT touch the floor when he bends over to wipe after he poops, life would be grand. Until then, I will carry a boat load of disinfecting wipes/gel/etc.

Okay, so I may have exaggerated a little, and potty training might not exactly be the devil... but it is pretty chaotic. How did you potty train your child(ren)?